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Wednesday, January 29, 2014

Being A Part Of Visionary Press.

A couple of weeks ago, I became a member of The Visionary Press. I can't fully express my excitement over this. It was as if all of my hard work and dedication had finally paid off. Not only were all of the members so talented, they  welcomed me with open arms. I looked around at everyone in awe. I mean, these are extremely talented people. Being a part of their family was an honor. When I told everyone of my great news, they all mostly acted like it was not a huge deal. As if it wasn't a huge accomplishment. I was a little hurt. It's not as if they accept just anyone to their group. They don't just take ANYONE as a member. You must possess skill. You must be talented. I was waiting for the cheers, the pats on the back. So I guess what I'm saying is, when I hit the big time, I don't want their pats on the back. I don't want their congratulations. They can keep it. 

Uncaring Father

How dare you help create me, and then just walk out on me?
Never once did you try to make me a part of your new family. 

Instead I was an outcast, I was never good enough. 
I could never please you, never earn your fatherly love. 

But your hatred and resentment was as clear as the light of day. 
I saw in your eyes every single time you looked my way. 

I felt it with the beatings you felt I so richly deserved. 
It was in your voice every time you ever uttered a word. 

Yet  I was desperate for your love, for your acceptance of me. 
But your heart held no love..it was dark , cold and empty. 

Instead of allowing your cruelty to turn me into a person like you, 
I became better, I'm able to love..which was more than you could ever do. 


Monday, January 27, 2014

Like Air.

 I can never get enough of you. 
I always want more and more. 
My desire is never quenched, 
Instead, it seems to just soar. 

I want to breath you in and out
Like the very air itself. 
Drink you in like water, until this thirst is quelled. 

Day and Night

In the light of day..
Insecurity is my only companion.
Heartache is the only emotion I know.
Fears and worries are constant thoughts,
Pain consumes my very soul.

In the light of day..
My every flaw is put up on display.
Shame surrounds me like a thick quilt.
Embarrassment trails my every move,
Never allowing me to forget my guilt.

In the light of day..
Every sin of mine is plain to see.
Rays of light point out every single one.
Disgust filled eyes follow me always.
Finding me no matter where I try to run.

In the darkness of night..
Courage is a dear friend of mine.
Happiness surrounds me like a halo.
Here, pain and fear can't find me.
Bravery is the only emotion I know.

In the darkness of night..
Flaws no longer cause me shame.
Proudly I show them for all to see.
Here, they don't make me different.
They simply make me unique.

In the darkness of night..
Sins don't make up the person I am.
They are but scars from battles lost and won.
Here, in the night, I'm safe and I'm free.
Here, I will never again have to run.

Finding The Light

I was lost in darkness,
Never seeing the light.
I doubted if I'd ever
Finally get things right.

I was waiting for someone
To come to my rescue.
When I came to realize,
Your only rescuer is you..

It was time to put the
Dark thoughts from my mind.
Time to live again.. to
Feel the warm sunshine.

To laugh, to smile, to be myself.
To just be happy.
Life was out there waiting,
To warmly embrace me.